Life Coaches: Are You Helping Each Other?

In the post ‘You’re Probably Wasting Your Time On Facebook’ I talked about a thread in a coach’s LinkedIn group that was positively harmful to the Facebook presence of every Life Coach joining in.

If you want to know more on that, click the link above and check out the post.

Way back in 2008 when I was getting into my stride with blogging I got to know a lot of other self development bloggers.

Some were Life Coaches and others wannabe Life Coaches looking to segue into the industry. 

But most were self development enthusiasts who wanted to write on the topic and maybe monetize their blog by supplying products either as an affiliate or their own original content.

You Have To Dump Your Pride And Reach Out!

And the reason I got to know so many people was that I regularly reached out and contacted them.

I exchanged links (back when that was a good idea four SEO purposes, now, not so much) and I asked for help and advice and offered help and advice.

I was very respectful of other peoples time and didn’t hassle anybody or refuse to take ‘no’ for an answer.

IN such cases, I just moved on to the next person.

I was involved in groups (one of which was quite large and had a lot of success for a certain amount of time) that supported and promoted each other’s material on Social Media – in particular, ‘Stumble Upon’.

We shared guest posts, commented on each other’s new blog posts and shared best practice on building our lists and generating traffic.

In those days, rarely a week went past when I didn’t chat on the phone or Skype with somebody else working, or at least hanging out, in the self development space.

And with a few exceptions, everybody had each other’s back and we all benefited from supporting one another.

Some of the people I got to know have gone on to big things and I know that if I want help I can still call on them.

Although to be fair and respectful of the number of requests they get, I only ever do this if it’s important.

Similarly, they can, and occasionally do, ask me for a helping hand and I’m always happy to oblige.

Why Aren’t New Life Coaches Doing This?

All that work formed the basis of my success.

And I hesitate to use the word ‘success’ for fear of disappearing up my own arse, but you know what I mean.

I rarely see Life Coaches doing this kind of thing and I’m not entirely sure why that is.

It could be that coaches are nervous of helping other coaches. Because after all, they are the competition, right?

And why would you send potential clients to your competitors?

Or perhaps coaches don’t feel comfortable doing this for fear of looking incompetent?

Or even that they think they are better off doing things by themselves.

There’s No Room For A Scarcity Mindset

If it’s the first reason, dump the scarcity mindset now!

There are tens of thousands of Life Coaches out there and most are struggling.

You, forming an alliance with 5, 10 or even 20 other Life Coaches hurts the coaches out there trying to do things all on their own and being scared shitless of sharing tips and resources, not you!

If it’s because you are nervous or too introverted, then you may be in the wrong profession. 

How can you help your clients push through their own discomfort if you don’t know how to push through your own?

Every one of your clients is asking you for help in some way, shape or form.

What makes you think you’re above that?

And if you think you can do everything yourself – good luck!

You’re either a very special snowflake because I know damn well I can’t, or you’re fooling yourself all the way toward failure.

You Have To Be Ok With Asking For Help

I get numerous requests for free help every week and I respond positively to a good proportion.

I’ve spent about an hour and a half this week talking to two other new coaches who asked for help.

Most of the time I tell people who e-mail me to call my cell between 10.30 and 11.30 am as I’m usually out with the dogs then and can talk.

75% of the time I never hear from those people again and that is NOT how you reach out.

They just wanted me to tell them how to succeed via e-mail.

Actually having to pick up the phone to me was a bit more trouble than they anticipated or desired.

I cannot say yes to every request, and if I suspect it’s simply because somebody doesn’t want to spend the money on hiring me or training with me when they have it, then I’m unlikely to be as accommodating.

Join The Fully Booked Coach Community!

I started The Fully Booked Coach Facebook Community as a vehicle to enable some of what I’m saying above.

Any coach or wannabe coach can join, and as it’s a closed group,  you can ask anything without fear of it being indexed or viewable to the wider Google community.

I answer every question asked of me in there, but there are sadly few of them.

Of course, that could mean everybody is nailing it and no help is needed.

But I doubt it.

I don’t want to appear arrogant, but I am a resource to most new coaches.

A resource I would have milked senseless 10 years ago.

I have been where you have been, albeit a decade ago and as such I know a lot of the pitfalls in terms of time wasters, money wasters and energy wasters.

Of course, I’d rather you hire me or train with me, but if you cannot afford that or just want to see what value I can add first, then that’s cool with me.

I LOVE helping people.

Why do you think I’m a Life Coach ffs, because it sure ain’t for the money!

But this isn’t about me, it’s about you becoming a more successful coach and you do that by forming alliances.

Liking each other’s Facebook page is a bad idea unless that is you are going to engage with one another, then it’s a great idea.

Equally, it’s a great idea to share each other’s blog posts on Google+, Twitter and any other SM platforms you employ.

It’s also cool to share articles on Life Coaching, great books you have read and talk through interesting or testing client sessions you have had (maintaining client confidentiality of course to hear how other coaches would have dealt with problems.

How do you do this?

Form A Mastermind Group

I heard that Tracy Coan formed a mastermind group after being on a Fully Booked Coach training.

I honestly don’t know how it’s going/went, but good for her!

Tracy has my utmost respect and admiration for trying to shake things up (as well as a dofollow link back to her site, and you will know the importance of that if you have read this post).

But she is the exception to the rule.

I want you to succeed.

I know that 95% of people who read this blog or who to subscribe to my newsletter and get my ‘Insiders Guide” tips will never hire me.

I could care less, I still want them/you to succeed.

$1,000 dropping into my PayPal account is nice and it has to happen from time to time of I am to keep this sustainable.

However, it’s not why I’m typing this on a Friday afternoon when I could be at the gym, meditating or sitting outside enjoying a beer.

It’s time to get busy if you want to succeed as a Life Coach.

Image: ‘Help’ Courtesy of The Monk

7 thoughts on “Life Coaches: Are You Helping Each Other?”

  1. Great post Tim! I relate to some of that terror of “THESE ARE MY CLIENTS” when you’re starting out. I do think though that it’s crucial to have a huge referral network for clients who could use coaching…just not yours. People remember when you provide value and when you were truly in it for their best interest. You might not work with them but their uncle needs you now. You also did another coach a favor which means you’re more likely to get some referrals from them as well.

    Everyone just scratch everyone else’s back. No one needs to be itchy. 😉

  2. I always think there’s enough clients for coaches. As a matter of fact, your playing small means that you are just insecure and are not confident in your ability and competence. While you’re focusing your energy on things that are out of your control, you lose the chance to be the creator of your life. If you are an extraordinary coach, then clients will come to you unquestionably (of course if you also know and are competent on the business side of a coaching practice).

    • I agree there are enough clients Dang, we just need to educate them that it maybe a coach that can benefit them the most.

      More people would hire coaches if they actually knew what we did!

  3. Mmm. I try to be SO conscious of *not* taking advantage of people’s willingness to help and pick their brains for free. I feel slightly less icky about it in a group setting as it’s just putting a question “out there” for discussion, but would feel super awkward hitting the Google+ community for free advice all the time. I guess in part I’ve been conditioned by internet “gurus” saying it’s all about the giving and very little about the taking and how you should never ask anyone for anything…

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